The Other F Word

Via one of my favourite lunchtime blogs, Manolo's Shoe Blog, I have of late found myself foraging into a Strange New World. It's a world of women who are happy with the way they look despite not being The Perfect Ten - women who call themselves "fat" and like it.

The journey started with an innocent link to Manolo for the Big Girl, who in turn led me to the Fat Experience Project. Sitting there with my sandwich and my crisps I read some of the articles, frowned a bit, and read them again. Something was putting me on edge - not with anger, but with discomfort - and I couldn't work out what it was.

It took me a while to realise that the reason was simply because of the prolific use of the word Fat. But why on earth would that be? I don’t blink at the use of the word f*ck* (I use it a lot) and along with Eve Ensler of the Vagina Monologues I reclaimed the word c*nt a long time ago. But Fat really bothered me.

In a world where casual swearing is everywhere, is Fat the last taboo?

I have an affectionately insulting relationship with a number of my friends and it will always amuse me to yell "oi, slapper" across the street and watch them turn around to see who's calling. But we would never, under any circumstances, tease each other about the F word - it's just too damning. "Fat" has become synonymous with failure on a deeply personal and unforgiving level. It conjures up the image of someone who is lazy, who doesn’t control their eating and who doesn't care about their health - and to call someone fat suggests such a level of scorn that the relationship might never recover.

So when I first read the FEP comments it threw me a bit. Sweet baby J, I said to myself, these people are just admitting to Fat like it's a completely ok thing to be - not in a lack-of-self-esteem-I'm-miserable-help-me-please way – but simply saying that this is who I am, I'm "fat" and you know what? I like it. I don't eat badly, I exercise and keep fit, and this is the shape and the person that my biology makes me.

The more I read on, the more I liked what I saw. It made me wonder if Fat can be saved. Does it really have to be such a damnable insult? Can we ever turn it around to mean something more than it does today, namely failure in the eyes of an exacting and thin-obsessed society? Can't we bring it back to life for the sake of all those people who keep themselves fit, aren't eating themselves into an early grave and yet will never be the perfect 10, 12 or 14? (And don't give me any of your Rubenesque nonsense, either. We want Fat back and we ain't taking no cheap substitutes.)

Hell, we did it for c*nt, surely the F word is a piece of... um... cake?

*Asterixed for the sake of those who haven't yet liberated themselves from the male domination of our language - and those whose boss is reading over their shoulder ;)